
Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/934907.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Choose_Not_To_Use_Archive_Warnings, Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Sherlock_(TV)
  Relationship:
      Sebastian_Moran/Jim_Moriarty, Richard_Brook/Sebastian_Moran, Richard
      Brook/Jim_Moriarty
  Character:
      Jim_Moriarty, Richard_Brook, Sebastian_Moran
  Additional Tags:
      Sex, Underage_Sex, Jim_is_mean
  Series:
      Part 2 of Hope_for_the_hoplesss
  Stats:
      Published: 2013-08-21 Words: 2922
****** I'll hurt you with love ******
by ProfessorPlum
Summary
     Jim wears different clothes now. He wears tank tops that show his
     skinny arms when he takes his coat off and jeans that are too tight.
     I don't tell Jim that mum would never want him wearing those clothes
     but to look presentable I wear a button down.
Notes
See the end of the work for notes
We are sixteen when our mum dies.


She dies in the hospital and I cry a lot when someone comes to tell us. Jim
cries too but all I see are the small tears that run down his face when he is
sitting next to the window. He says we're going to have to move now, that we
won't be allowed to stay in this house all alone. That makes me cry more and
Jim hugs me. He always hugs me when I cry.


Mum's funeral is held in March. It's nice and unusually warm and it reminds me
of her. People stand in a half circle around her grave as we listen to a man
talk about her who's never even met her before. Some people cry including me
but Jim doesn't, he just says that funerals are boring. People put flowers on
the dirt where a few meters bellow is our mother. I put roses because I think
they smell nice like her, and Jim just watches. Everyone keeps saying they are
sorry for our loss but we didn’t lose her, she just dies. When we are done
someone from our church tells us that they will always be there for us but
we’ve never even talked to her before.


The plan is we are going to live with our uncle in London. I don't want to move
to England but Jim says its bigger and better then Ireland. We've only ever
seen our uncle once at Christmas when we were seven. He has a lot of money but
never spends it on anything other than alcohol. I don't remember him very well
but Jim says he makes a lot of stupid jokes and he is ashamed to be named after
the man.

 
We get to take a plane to London, all our stuff is in suitcases and bags.
Clothes, books, anything we want to keep. We have never been on a plane before
and I can tell Jim is excited to be flying. I am a little nervous but Jim holds
my hand and kisses me on the cheek. I'm just glad he doesn't kiss my lips in
public. Since we had sex Jim has kept a little more distance that I am more
then happy with maintaining.
 

The ride to Heathrow airport is fun; we play games on paper when Jim is not
distracted by looking out the window. All we can see is clouds for the most
part but Jim loves it. I read my book of poems and write one of my own.
 
 
When we are finally about to land and I make a small noise of discomfort
concerning our dissent, Jim leans over and kisses me on the lips. It is a
reassuring kiss and one I gladly take so I can forget about falling lower and
lower. When we land Jim takes my hand as we are herded out of the plan by the
people around us. We have only enough time to grab our carry-on bags before we
are pushed with the rest of people out to the airport.


Everything look's clean but Jim tells me it's a lie and not to touch anything
unless I want to get sick. He tells me that he's sure it could be a metaphor
for something though he can't think what. We make our way out where Uncle James
is supposed to be waiting for us. At first we think he must have forgotten but
then we hear someone shout, "Jimmy! Richard!" And we both see him, standing by
a car that looks both old and dusty. Like uncle.


We walk to where our uncle is standing and he gives us a sad smile. "Hey, sorry
to hear what happened with your mum." You would think with it being his sister
he would be a little more choked up. He opened the car door for us and we climb
in with our bags. "I'm having the rest of your stuff delivered to the flat
alright?" he asks and both of us nod. "I haven't seen you guys-what? Since you
were thirteen?"


"Seven," Jim corrects him but uncle pretends not to notice that Jim even said
anything. Uncle talks more and tells us that we can go to school next month
even though the school year is almost over. We don't listen much as he talks
and drives and when we get to the house the only thing we hear him say is that
our rooms are up stairs.


He unlocks the door to the old looking flat and I remember what Jim said about
him only spending money on alcohol. We have our own bedrooms but mine feels
cold and empty like how I felt inside after mum died. I put my things down on
the boring looking bed and listen to it creek as my bag lands in the middle of
the sheets. I walk across the hall where Jim is sitting on his own creaky bed
looking out the window. "This place is kinda creepy," I say in a small voice as
I make my way over and sit down next to him.


"I agree." He looks over at me with a small smile and leans closer to kiss me.
I kiss back because I know it will make him happy. "But don't worry. It'll be
great. A new school, new friends..."


That night after our dinner of macaroni and cheese because uncle needs to go
shopping, me and Jim retire to bed. I follow Jim to his because I don't want to
be alone in mine. We stay up with our torches on under the blankets and we tell
stories before falling asleep.



 
===============================================================================



School is boring. I don't have very many friends but I tell myself not to worry
since it is only April and I still have two months before its summer holiday.
Jim has returned to his schedule of sneaking out most nights but now I hardly
sleep those nights since the flat creeks on its own. I ask Jim to stay home but
he tells me that he's late. I don't know what he could be late for.


Uncle lets be buy books to read and I can visit the library on the weekends. I
feel very alone until one night when I am in my room reading. Jim is wearing is
coat and it's getting darker out. The clouds are a pretty pink that looks like
candy floss against the blue sky. "Hay, wanna come with me?" He asks.


"Come-come with you?" I repeat like a parrot.


"Yeah, I'm going to hang out with a friend." I think this might be a trick
because Jim has never had friends before but I shrug before getting up and
setting my book down on the creaky bed.


Jim wears different clothes now. He wears tank tops that show his skinny arms
when he takes his coat off and jeans that are too tight. I don't tell Jim that
mum would never want him wearing those clothes but to look presentable I wear a
button down. I am still taller because Jim hasn't grown and I'm taller than
uncle too. I have thinned out which I think Jim must like because we don't eat
much when uncle forgets to go shopping.


We walk out the flat and down the street until we get to a busy road and Jim
can get a cab. “Where did you get the money?" I ask because Jim can pay for
this cab.
 

"I nicked it. You know uncle keeps all his money hidden. I found a few of his
stashes the greedy bastard." Jim laughs and I nod though I know stealing is a
sin. We drive a long ways, until we aren't on the busy streets anymore. Jim
pays a lot of quid to come this far but he hops out and pays. I follow Jim and
I don't know what we could possibly be doing here when I see a boy sitting on
the dirty ground throwing rocks. He jumps up when he sees us, patting his arse
clean of dust.


"Hey Jim and... other Jim?" He asks cocking his head to the side as he looks at
us. He has blond hair and is a lot taller than even I am when he stands.


Jim rolls his eyes with a smile. "I told you I had a brother. His name's
Richard."


"Then I wasn't listening," the boy says before pulling Jim roughly closer to
him and kissing him. Jim pulls away.


"What the fuck did I tell you before? You can't just snog me whenever you
want!"


Sebastian holds up his hands in mock surrender. "Yeah, yeah. I'm Sebastian," he
holds out a hand to me but I don't take it. Jim kissed him, they kissed, how
long has this been going on? What if they've had sex. Sebastian is trying to
steal Jim away from me. "Kinda shy, huh?" He asks with a smile. I have to admit
he is very beautiful. I feel bad for wanting to know what he looks like without
a shirt on, I'm sure he has a very impressive chest. I bit my lip trying not
think those sinful thoughts. It isn't natural.


"I've never seen you at school," I say, crossing my arms. Jim answers for him.


"Sebastian is nineteen, he doesn't go to school." Sebastian nods and pulls a
cigarette out of his pocket, put's it between his lips and lights it. I want to
run away. This is very bad, I shouldn't even be here. Neither should Jim. "So
are we going to go to your house or what?" Jim asks.


"Yeah, follow me. You too Richie," no one calls me Richie except Jim. I follow
them and they are holding hands like a couple. I hope they're not but it makes
me mad to think about. Jim is my brother, he's only allowed to kiss me and hold
my hand. I kick rocks and wave the smoke away from my face  that is drifting
back from the cigarette. I walk beside Jim so I'm not tempted to watch
Sebastian's arse as he walks.


His house is big, though it looks like no one has taken care of it. There are
no neighbors for a long way off and the grass around the house is yellow and
dead looking. It turns out Sebastian's mum died when he was just a kid and his
dad drinks even more then Jim and I's uncle. "We can go to my room, dad won't
be home for a while," he says. "Probably," Sebastian finishes and flicks the
cigarette onto the grass were I'm sure it will catch fire.


When we get up to his room Sebastian sits down on his bed and Jim sits with him
and they kiss. "Why'd you bring him?" Sebastian asks and I pretend I don't hear
him talking about me.


"He looked bored," Jim answered and I look out the window so I don't have to
watch them snogging.


"I thought you were going to let me fuck you."


"Something like that." And then I hear my name being called. "Richie, come
here." I do as Jim tells me and sit down on the bed so that Jim is in the
middle of me and Sebastian. "Kiss me," Jim orders. I don't want to, I don't
want Sebastian to see so I go to kiss Jim on the cheek. Jim turns my head so
our lips meet instead. I try to pull back put Jim pushes me down on the bed and
rubs my cock through my trousers. I can't help but get aroused at the contact
but it's gone all to soon and my cheeks are flushed as I sit back up and try to
hide my hard-on.


"You're fucked up Jim," Sebastian says though I know he's hiding a smile by the
tone of his voice. "You're brother too. You just a whole fucked up family."


"Oh don't pretend you don't love it, Seb." Seb grins and Jim kisses him again.
I feel used. "Now your turn Richie. You both have a hard on, now kiss Sebastian
for me." I don't.


"Jim, honestly-" Sebastian says but Jim cuts him off.


"Do it Richard." I want to do it. I want to snog Sebastian because the thought
is cock-hardening itself. I get up and walk to the other side of Sebastian, sit
down, and swallow before leaning in. I close my eyes as we kiss, he tastes like
smoke which almost makes me pull away but he's holding onto my shit, keeping me
from moving back.  When he does let go I pull away. Jim claps his hand
together. "Oh yes, I've made up my mind. Sebastian. You're going to fuck
Richard and I'm going to watch."


"Oh come on magpie, I thought it was going to be the two of us tonight,"
Sebastian whines.


"Please 'Bastian, do it for me?" Jim asks in a very annoying voice.


Sebastian turns to look at me again. "I dunno Richie. What do you think?" I
think no. I can't say no to Jim though. He will get mad at me. He will leave me
all alone in the big creaky flat if I say no. He is the only person who stays.
So I nod.  "Really?" Sebastian takes off his shirt and I don't stop my eyes
from wandering down to his tanned chest. "You got him wrapped around your
finger don't you Jimmy boy? Ever done this before Richie?" He asks me.


"Yes..." I mutter truthfully. Jim get's up and takes a bottle out of the
bedside table, returning to lean his back against the head bored.


"Fucked him myself about seven months ago," Jim said.


"Like I said-" Sebastian unbuttons his jeans and slips them off. "-Fucked up." 
I crawl on my hands and knees over the sheets to sit by Jim.


"Richie, take off your cloths," Jim says.


I do as I'm told but say in a quiet voice. "Please Jim. I don't want to. It's a
sin."


"Honestly, it's not a sin to have sex with anyone. Or want to have sex with
anyone. Now take off your pants." I'm ashamed of my hard-on but Sebastian is
naked now and his body captivates me. I want to run my hands over his skin, he
is strong and scared and I know I'm staring.


"Two queer kinds, huh?" I lay my head on Jim's lap as Sebastian speaks.  "You
sure that's not what killed your mum?"


"She never knew, and besides, Richard goes for girls too."


"Same here, Richie." He takes the bottle of lubricant from Jim's hand and puts
some on his fingers before wrapping his hand around my cock and stroking, still
looking at Jim.  I gasp though I'm pretty ignored.


"I know. You both disgust me," Jim says petting my hair. Sebastian lifts my
legs over his hips before pressing two fingers in my arse. I whimper because I
remember Jim doing it too me and I shut my eyes. I try to imaging it's Jim
again as Sebatsian adds another finger and pushes them farther into me.
Suddenly I yelp as he hits something wonderful inside me. It feels like
pleasure and pain at the same time. I've never felt it before.


"You like that?" Sebastian asks and I nod, trying to imagine it's Jim's voice.


"I'm getting bored watching you finger him," Jim's voice says and then
regrettably all the fingers are removed and I feel something much bigger
pushing into my arse, bigger then Jim's cock.


"Please," I say. "I can't-I can't."  But Jim only pets my hair and tells me to
shush. I hear Sebastian moan deeply. I open my eyes to see that they are
kissing above me and I let out a dry sob to remind them that I am still here in
pain. They don't stop snogging but Sebastian reaches down and takes my cock in
his hand as he starts to stroke and move his hips.


I let out whimpers but once Sebastian starts moving faster he hits the most
fantastic spot again that makes me shiver. "Y-yes." I shudder as the pleasure
shoots through my body.


"I think he likes it.." Jim isn't talking to me though, just about me.


"He's not so bad either," Sebastian says and his voice sounds breathless. Jim
is still petting my hair and Sebastian's hand is still gripping my cock and all
too soon I am cumming and it's the best feeling I've ever felt because
Sebastian is still ridding me through it.


"S-stop," I say when it get's too much and Sebastian does and pulls away too
quickly. Sebastian's bed is big enough that we can all three lay side by side
pretty comfortably.


"God he's as bad as you are Jim, I'm so fucking hard."


Jim moves my head off his lap and sits next to Sebastian. "Wank yourself off,
I'll watch," Jim says. I don't watch though, and all I here is soft grunts from
Sebastian and then Jim's voice speaking nice things to him. I'm very tired and
I just want to go to sleep. Sebastian lays beside me and I assume Jim lays
beside him and they are talking but I don't really listen to what they're
saying because next minute someone is pulling the blanket over me and that's
when I fall asleep.








To eventually be continued...


End Notes
     Let's hope I can keep this going I seem to be on a roll so far. Ideas
     never hurt anyone (though Robert Oppenheimer would beg to differ) so
     if you have anything you'd like to see don't hesitate to comment.
Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed
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